Happy 1st Birthday Gemma!

Last year on February 18th, 2010 our lives changed forever.  It started out like any normal day, we got up for work that morning and I remember thinking how big I felt, like I was already 'full term' but still had two months to go.  Due to severe ligament pains I was looking forward to an early maternity leave in the next few weeks.  None of my pregnancy books could have prepared me for what was about to happen a few hours later.  I went to BC Womens for a check up, they knew right away something was wrong (I had Polyhydramnious) and 15 minutes later I was going in for an emergency cesarian.  I was in complete shock, I was 31 weeks pregnant and had no idea you could have a baby two months early.  There wasn't enough time for preperation so they put me under and I woke up unsure what had happened.  Moments later my husband appeared through the curtain and I asked him where our baby was, but he also didn't know and went to find out.  I lay there in shock, worried and my body shook due to the anesthetic.  They took us to a room in the NICU where our baby was laying unconscious and we were explained the details of her traumatic entrance into this world.  Our daughter was resuscitated and appeared to be born with some type of neuromuscular disorder. We had no idea anything was wrong with her in utero, only that 'clubfoot' was suspected.  During birth she endured femur fractures and was wearing a Pavlik harness, she was surrounded in wires and intubated.  We were told the words 'she might not be compatable with life' and it was hard to wrap our head around exactly what that meant.  We took everything day by day and our daughter continued to fight and make progress.  The names we had considered for her no longer suited her and we decided on 'Gemma' as she was our 'precious gem'.  Her middle names 'Violet' (the flower and colour of her new birth month) and Neselle (we came up with meaning 'miracle' - 'girl').  The previous blogs that I posted to this site in her first year of life were e-mails that I sent friends and family about her progress that I wanted to share with you. 

The first few months were extremely difficult, Gemma endured many complications.  Reading the board by the front desk helped give us hope and that is why this blog is there for all the families who need to hear what others went through and find that hope for themselves.  One thing that stood out for me that another mom wrote that their child had it as bad as it can get, reading everything they went through made me think that maybe my daughter could overcome as well.  Being in the NICU was the most difficult and trying time of our families lives and every day was filled with uncertainty.  We would have days of hope and then days of devistation, we never knew what direction we were headed and having a lot of opinions made it more complicated at times.  We eventually had to rely completely on our daughter and God, and put everything in their hands.  What really helped us was talking to families in similar situations, they had been there as well and lived it.  Also having primary nurses that knew our daughter, the changes they could see with her and could advocate for our family, they were our rock and support.  There was uncertainty for a long time and it took a long time for others to see what we had seen all along in Gemma.  Our daughter has what is considered to be a progressive disorder and with her being undiagnosed we can not predict her exact prognosis but no matter her journey we support her.  We listened to our insticts as parents and decided to give her a tracheostomy so that we could bring her home to take care of her and it was the best decision we ever made.  At the time everything was really scary to us, we didn't know what to expect.  As Gemma healed from her procedure things instantly changed, we were finally able to hold her without risk of extubation, we could see her face, we could walk her around and start giving her a life, most importantly she was so much more comfortable and happier. We were finally able to get training to prepare to go home, words we had longed to hear.  This seemed like an impossible goal those many months in the hospital.  We never knew if we could ever take our daughter home and lived in that fear each and every day for the first 7 months of complications, then recovery, then infections, then healing, then surgeries, procedures, agreements, disagreements, meetings, watching other families go home and also having other families lose their children.  It was heart breaking but we kept one thing in mind, we were once told to focus on our child amongst all the distraction and listen to what is she telling us.  It is hard to explain but we could always see hope in Gemma.  In December the happiest day of our lives happened and we welcomed our daughter home!  Gemma has been thriving and doing so well, she is such an amazing joy.  Life for our whole family, and most importantly for Gemma, is a million times better. 

This month we celebrate a day we never knew we would see, our daughters first birthday.  We invited all of our friends and family to celebrate it with us and it was such a wonderful day.  Thank you to all of you who joined us for such a joyous, memorable occassion! :-) 

Our local newspaper wrote an article about it:
http://www.bclocalnews.com/richmond_southdelta/richmondreview/news/116363354.html